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Setahun

Oktober selalu menjadi bulan yang istimewa untukku. Kamu tahu apa, disaat Oktober tiba, aku merasakan keceriaan sahabat-sahabatku memeperingati hari istimewa mereka. Begitu juga kita, setahun terlewati sudah. Dengan segala bab yang diceritakan pada langit dan gemintang. Segala peluh debu yang menjadi teman kala perjalanan entah berantah dilakukan. Kala cerita pantun gombal menemani kerja tiada henti hingga jam pulang berdentang. Nyaris tiap detik kita habiskan penuh gelak tawa, cerita hingga pagi menjelang, dan telepon entah kapan tertutup.

Setahun betapa dapat menjungkirbalikan kehidupan anak manusia. Seperti kata para pendahulu kita, kita tidak dapat memilih jalan takdir kita. Tapi kita dapat memilih akan menjadi benar atau salah. Akan melaju atau diam ditempat. Seperti cinta, kita tak bisa memilih kepada siapa akan jatuh cinta. Kadang mau menjatuhkan pilihannya pada tempat yang tak akan pernah diduga. Yang tak akan pernah disangka. 

Kamu tahu disini setahun berlalu, aku sangat rindu. Rindu akan segalanya. Rindu kita yang dulu. Betapa aku sangat rindu hanya menenggak segelas kopi ditepian pantai hingga malam menjemput. Rindu melepasmu dibandara kala akan pergi meninggalkanku berminggu-minggu. Rindu akan sapa suaramu hingga menemani tidurku hingga lelap. Rindu akan alarm yang selalu membangunkanku untuk sekedar mengingatkan solat Shubuh. Rindu dengan ocehanmu diantara jalur pendakian. Rindu kala ku melihat langit dan menoleh kau selalu berada dibelakang untuk menjagaku. Rindu akan menyelami kedalaman hingga ketinggian. Dan aku rindu sebuah nasihat hangat menenangkan kala gelap menyapa hariku.

Ya aku sangat rindu, rindu segalanya. Kamu bilang aku cengeng? Mungkin iya aku cengeng, cengeng untuk dapat menerima segala nyata. Segala hari yang telah lewat. Kamu tahu aku sangat rindu dan sangat mencintai setahun itu. Jika bisa ku meminta pada Tuhan, apa yang ingin aku miliki. Aku hanya ingin engkau ada disini. Ditepian laut, terdiam tanpa suara, bercerita melalui hati. Sesaat kumelepaskan segala beban dibahumi, dan menatap angkasa luas tiada batas, tiada sekat.

Biar kutitipkan segala rindu pada angin diketinggian sana. Menyelami damai dalam tenang ombak. Merasakan hawamu diantara pinus di belantara sana. Melepaskan segala gundah dan lelah pada sebuah doa. Dengan semua itu aku yakin, Tuhan kan menjagamu selalu, kutitipkan selalu namamu dalam setiap sujud dan doaku. Untuk kebahagianmu, untuk kesuksesanmu. Dan izinkan aku selalu mencintaimu hingga akhir nafas ini berhembus.....

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